28) Has
your submission ever let you down? Have you ever been criticized for your
submission? Have you ever regretted being or feeling submissive in a moment or
in a relationship? Have you ever looked back and realized you made a mistake
and how did you handle your submission going forward from that.
Yes to all,
but I really don’t feel comfortable sharing details on this one with the World
Wide Web. In handling it, I stepped back, re-evaluated and brought myself back on
the course that I desired most.
29) Is pain
or humiliation (spankings for example) a part of your submission? What is your
relationship to it? Do you embrace it as a part of your submission, tolerate it
as necessary or have some other type of relationship with it?
Pain, yes.
Humiliation, by that name is not a part of my submission. Humility, however,
is. I am a sadomasochist, so pain is part of our play as well as punishment.
The purpose behind the pain alters my reception and reaction to it.
I do embrace the pain both as a part of my submission and as something entirely separate. Being sadistic as well as masochistic means that I have to give not only my desire to be hurt but my desire to hurt others to my Sir, including him.... especially him. Holding sadism and masochism separate from the typical concepts of Dominant and submissive means that I do not associate one with the other. I've seen submissive sadists and masochistic Dominants.
While pain is often a tool used in power exchange, it is not something that only goes one way. When we learn to let go of those preconceived notions that Dominants deal the pain and submissives accept it an entire new realm of possibilities appears, leaning more toward the primal side of human nature. One must yield and another must triumph in order for the balance to be found, but, in the balance, both have won.
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