Has
your submission increased or decreased over time? Have you ever had to
renegotiate your submission due to a change in your feelings or circumstance?
Yes. My submission is situational, I think.
Submission is a constant, but the persons and the environments involved and the
things going on in my life alter how present my submission is in my mind. I
have had to renegotiate my submission because I simply could not handle the
stresses brought on by a combination of new and challenging rules, a recent
divorce, two children, work and contemplating returning to school at the time.
Submission is like walking a balance beam.. not quite as treacherous as a tightrope (haha) but still a challenge to maintain
equilibrium within one’s self and one’s relationships as well as one’s
responsibilities. I suppose what I mean is that my submission increases and
decreases from moment to moment. It’s a constant fluctuation in order to
maintain balance in the circus that is my life.
Is
there a physical position that makes you feel most submissive?
I don’t
know if it “makes” me feel most submissive, but the position that I feel most
submissive in, and I feel expresses my submission best is to kneel at my Owner’s
feet, wrap my arms around his legs and rest my head on the tops of his feet. There
is also my “happy place” which varies between a modified nadu with my head on
my Owner’s knee and my hands on his ankle or my arms and legs wrapped around
his leg. As well as a position kneeling with my knees wide, hips up, arms
outstretched on the floor before me.
These don’t
really have names for me at the moment… We've so far avoided using most of the
usual names for positions and we haven’t really gotten much into position
training, but those three really take me to my deepest submissive mindset, I
think.
